It’s been a while since a #MondayMotivation post has been published. We all dislike Mondays, it can be a new start to a new week and new goals, but it can also mean reality has set it for certain things.
January hasn’t been totally horrible for me but I was put to the test on many occasions.
One obstacle the pressure I put on myself to have fresh content for the blog consistently. This is my second post of the month. This time last year I was more consistent.
One thing I may not have really touched on in-depth is how my anxiety is set up. I can be fine for weeks and not have any issues with my anxiety but then out of nowhere I experience anxiety.
The month of January has been slow business wise and that has stressed me out because it’s causing me to feel discouraged and second guessing following my dreams. I have a dope support system that continues to push and motivate me.
An incident that happened with a friend one night we were out for food and drinks. Out of nowhere I noticed something was not right with them and they had a glare in their eyes, a blank stare, they wouldn’t respond when I asked what was wrong. They reached to grab my arm like they felt like they were losing control. They fell and began seizing. I immediately panicked but called 911. I couldn’t believe it was happening. It triggered my anxiety full force. It took me back to the night I seen my loved one pass out from dehydration and seeing their eyes roll back. Both incidents can’t get out of my head.
There’s more. Because that issues seeing my friend have a seizure I distanced myself for a week and then we went out did lunch and it was like they had another incident but this time they were talking through it and was in denial as if nothing happened. After that I realized I can’t be around this person is too much on me to worry. This person had to slow down and take care of themselves. When I look at them I just see them with a blank stare.
I had to get my mind right, I have to do what’s best for me.
This month I worked two weeks straight with no days off, took two days off and got back to the grind. The podcast will return end of next month, beginning of March. Thank you for your continuous support.
Check out my latest vlog https://youtu.be/bjXQg2KDJMw